Sensation as a Foundational Language
I'll start with two points, and dive in further as we go.
We are always practicing something, whether consciously or unconsciously.
Sensation is the practical and practicable language of transformation.
You are practicing what you are aligning your attention with in any given moment, either in the personal or the collective realms.
In the personal realm, you can begin to bring your awareness to your conditioned responses or survival strategies, creating a foundation of knowing your automatic reactions and unconscious impulses more coherently, and cultivating more choice for how you respond and react to people, events, situations, etc.
You could also begin to intentionally practice whatever qualities of being you are trying to cultivate more of, whether that's feeling more centered, confident, compassionate to self or other, etc.
In the collective realm, you can begin to bring your awareness to your patterned ways of reacting to politics, societal injustices, etc. (My patterned reaction is often that of fear, disgust, and despair.)
Another option is to align your attention and energy with the people and organizations dedicated to climate justice, social equity, anti-racism, etc, who are doing good work to make the world better place. (Perhaps cultivating qualities such as hope, inspiration, and relief.)
My clients who come to me for Hakomi Somatic Therapy often ask for some bullet points of what happened in our session, because the nature of Hakomi is such a bottom-up, present moment, body-based experience that lends itself to deep insight.
And yet, that insight can disappear like vapor when the session is over because it engages so much more of the brain other than the rational, thinking mind (the prefrontal cortex) that we often engage in during your average talk therapy session.
This is why this modality is so potent AND often requires intentional practice outside of our sessions in order for insight to integrate more fully into your daily life.
For example, during a session you had some moments of riding a wave of grief after confronting and feeling the way your body automatically pulls you out of your own center and people-pleases in most social situations. After that wave of emotion and insight passes, you get a sip of what it's like to genuinely feel more present and centered in yourself.
That's amazing, right!?
Yes, of course. AND, in order for this to integrate and have a transformative effect in your life, you have to continue to practice that feeling of being more present and centered in yourself, while simultaneously being aware of when you automatically start people-pleasing.
So how do you do this?
You use sensations in your body as your foundation for practice.
In the above example, this would look like really getting to know what sensations arise in your body when you people-please. And the important thing here is to get specific.
So, if I ask you how you know you are people-pleasing, rather than saying, "I get pulled out of my center and into the other person," you might say something more specific like "my chest tightens, my breath stops, my head juts forward, and my gaze locks in on the other person".
Okay, so now you have the practical, foundational elements of understanding your conditioned responses through the practicality of sensation. Once you see that clearly, you have more traction to effectively work with it.
How do you know you feel more centered in yourself? Using the practicality of sensation, the answer may be something like "my eyes and head feel soft, I feel my center of gravity is in my belly, I feel the energy in my legs and feet moving down and spreading out."
And these are the sensations you can start practicing! You have shifted from a vague notion of wanting to be more centered in yourself to the practical elements that underlie the foundation of a felt, sensory quality that you can practice. You can practice feeling those sensations, and begin to build that neural pathway that leads to a new way of being, rather than it just being an idea in your head that you can never seem to obtain.
I will say this with the important caveat that it's important to practice this in a way that is gentle. Sometimes, when we are trying to cultivate a new way of being, we can easily try to force ourselves into transformation. This often backfires.
Transformation is a toggle between the old and the new, and sometimes our center of gravity can really be engaged with the old, familiar way of being to the point that we don't always have access to the new way of being in a sensory way.
When this happens, just bring your awareness to whatever is here. If the old way, the conditioned response, the survival strategy is present, just get to know it more. Feel the contours of it in your body, rather than trying to make it go away or force through to the other side.
This is where self-compassion comes into play.
So, what are you practicing? What's important to you? What are you committed to?
It's important to have an intentional practice for which you set aside just a few minutes of your day. We are always practicing something, consciously or unconsciously. Just pause and notice what you are giving your attention to, what you are feeding.
And please be exquisitely gentle with yourself. Evolution isn't easy. Most people aren't that interested. So if you are doing this kind of deep internal inquiry, give yourself some credit! Even if others don't give you credit. I see you.
I hope that as you spend time with loved ones over the holidays, that this could be something to practice, or food for thought.
